As most of you guys know I am an anti-diet/intuitive eating nutritionist and body image coach. Today I wanted to address one of the biggest fears in becoming an undieter.
What if I gain weight?
You may hate everything that diet culture stands for. You may even despise it for how it’s affected your mental health and your overall life. Even if you are completely on board to reject a culture there can be a part of you that still wants to lose weight.
Leaping into the body positive world but still having that desire can often make us feel guilty or ashamed. But if you are still secretly wishing or hoping that you’re going to lose weight just know that that’s completely normal.
We live in a fatphobic society, so of course it’s only natural for us to want to be thinner. This stems from a deep desire to be accepted. Society says that thin is better so it’s only natural for us to try to pursue what “they” decide is acceptable.
This has been coded in our DNA from the time that we were cave people. If we weren’t accepted by a tribe we would be cast aside and likely starve to death or be eaten by a predator. Our survival relied on our likeability and acceptability.
So how can you overcome the desire to lose weight when you are pursuing body positivity?
Focus on real achievements and accomplishments instead of viewing weight loss as such. A true accomplishment is something that cannot be taken away from you.
Graduating high school.
Completing a post secondary degree.
Becoming a mother.
Winning a 5K.
These are all things that cannot be taken from you.
I want you to think about the last time that you lost weight…
The cheerleaders on social media in the comment section.
Being showered with external validation… It feels so good doesn’t it? Your inner caveman woman is basking in the love and acceptance that you are receiving from others.
But what happens when you start to gain the weight back? suddenly it’s crickets. No one is commenting anymore. Maybe you even start posting photos of yourself. Maybe you stop going out to family gatherings and social functions because you don’t want to be seen as a failure.
You see… Weight loss can be a slippery slope.
Shift your focus to real achievements and accomplishments.
And clap for your own damn self.